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How to get past infidelity

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The immediate response after discovering a spouse's affair is commonly disbelief, anger, sadness, loss or grief. It can take several years before the betrayed spouse is ready to even consider forgiveness, even if the partner who cheated begs for it. And through the cheating partner may immediately feel remorse and repeat "I'm sorry" over and over again, that apology may not get past the betrayed partner's outer layer of hurt. However, it is possible to move on and rebuild after infidelity. I have identified three distinct phases of recovery from an affair:
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Learning to Overcome Cheating

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Maintaining Relationships: How To Overcome Cheating ​ - Blog

When someone you love betrays your trust, it can feel like an insurmountable hurdle. But when you learn how to move on after infidelity, and with a little TLC, it's completely possible for your relationship to survive. If you feel consumed by betrayal and despair, take a moment to focus on appreciation. Think about everything you appreciate about your mate. After a few minutes of refocusing in this way, notice what changes inside you. When you are hurt, you may tend to blame, run, fight, judge or explain.
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Can I Get Over An Affair? The Three Phases Of Recovery

Sharing personal information brings people closer together. Verified by Psychology Today. Why Bad Looks Good. Forgetting to pick up bread and milk at the store on the way home is far less significant than forgetting to pick up an essential prescription for your partner. Across the board, however, one of the most devastating relationship transgressions is infidelity.
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The moment you find out your partner has been cheating on you, just about everything changes. Trust has been broken, and it may be difficult to imagine a future knowing that your closest companion has been intimate with someone else. So where do you go from here? Heading to divorce court is certainly one option, but you shouldn't assume it's the only or the best one for you: Statistics vary, but research shows that a sizable percentage of marriages manage to survive infidelity.

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